Dear Pastor Lily,
What Do Men Really Want?
During a recent bible study that somehow got way off track, the ladies and I were discussing what men are really looking for in a woman they’d like to marry. I suggested we ask you!
So, what do REAL men REALLY consider to be good wife marriage material?
Your friends – The Lady’s group in St. Monica’s NS
I love the side conversations that happen during bible studies. There’s a lot of value in some of those side topics and it can be one of the only places a young girl gets to be mentored and taught by an older godly woman.
I’m flattered that you thought of me and shared your question.
What Men Want In A Woman
This doesn’t mean having sex before marriage. In fact, if you’re actually on track to get married you should be able to have honest healthy conversations around sex. That doesn’t mean involve jumping into bed. Try discussing such things in a quiet coffee shop, in case the conversation takes a steamy turn. If a man is going to be expected to wait until after marriage, he is going to need a little reassurance that you are in fact interested in sex. If you have sexual abuse in your past, you need to make sure you’ve taken the appropriate steps to heal and recover in that area of your life.
Do you have similar goals and ethics around finances? Are you in agreement on key issues like tithing, debt and savings? Do you both enjoy spending your money on similar things? What are your priorities when you have extra spending money, travel, lifestyle upgrades, donations?
Do you both want kids and how many? If he wants a big family and you’re a one and done, kinda mama you’ve got to be able to clearly articulate that beforehand. You’re also going to want to discuss childcare in advance. At least having a general idea of the ideal situation; whether that’s being a stay at home mom or going back to work. If you’re extremely career oriented don’t pretend to be otherwise because you think that’s what he wants to hear. Having a healthy marriage starts during those early conversations way before the marriage proposal happens. Be honest and set yourself up for success.
Not a lot of drama
Whether that’s with family or friends. Do you know how to set up healthy boundaries or do you get sucked into every dispute and petty argument that catches your ear? Men want to know that their home isn’t going to become a war zone of your friend, sister and your dad.
Men want someone they can talk to on an equal level. It’s easy to overcompensate with a pretty face and a good sense of humor. But eventually what was once cute ignorance, becomes uncertainty over letting you make key decisions that will affect the well being of the family. We all have strengths and weaknesses, but it’s important to maintain a willingness to grow and learn.
That’s my Q to her A
I’d Love the hear the opinions of my readers!
What do you think men want?
If you are a Man, Please tell us, did I get it right? What do you Want?
I love learning about what you’re interested in. Those topics are what fuel this blog.
A lot of younger ladies were asking me about how to find, and attract a man who is marriage material.
They wanted to know why they the men they were dating would leave them heartbroken and feeling used.
I’ve been asked over and over again, “Is it me or them?
I carefully listened to your deepest questions and I put together a full course just for you!
I’m obsessed with creating a course that will teach you step by step everything you need to know in order to deal with the issues that have been holding you back from getting married. I also show exactly how to determine whether a man is marriage material or a loser. You’ll learn how to spot the Red flags of a bad relationship before it turns ugly. I’ll set you up for a phenomenal first date, that will give you instant feedback on whether that relationship is worth pursuing or a waste of time.
You’re going to get so much insight and value out of this course that I guarantee if you’ll follow the steps I show you, you’ll have the relationship skills you need to go from invisible to irresistible.
God Bless You!
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